You see I bought this new book online yesterday from Amazon and I have been eagerly waiting for it to come so I can read it.
This book is the mother of all self help books.
Basically this book will help you with anything that is wrong with you whether or not you actually have a problem.
More to the point, this book is the best book ever written in recorded history.
No it is not a bible.
What is this great book you ask?
The book is called “Understanding Women. Volume 1”
The only problem with the book that I can see so far is that it was written by a woman. This explains why it is 12,745 pages long, written in very fine small print, and also not available on Kindle.
I will be back in six or so months to write a review for you.
Interesting post, thank you!
ReplyDeleteI love your blog!
Never try to understand women, just nod and say yes in the appropriate places.
ReplyDeleteI also bought that book a few years back. Unfortunately, the UPS driver was also a woman and got lost. Months later when the book finally showed up, it was too late. Having desperately needed the relationship saving info within this book, I had been dumped waiting for it to arrive.
ReplyDeleteLately it's made a great foot stool, but maybe I should shake the dust off and actually give it a read. Anyone got a big ass highlighter?
(It's ok, i'm kidding ladies... sheesh)
SD
TheSimpleDude.com
The question isn’t can you understand them so much as should you understand them.
ReplyDeleteThat made me laugh because it's bloody true, what about the errata as they keep changing the rules?
ReplyDeletehahaha!!!! It is easy to understand us! We want Chocolate and Diamonds... it's that simple.
ReplyDeleteIt comes standard with Kindle, silly...
ReplyDeleteI just obey the boobs, and whatever they tell me. It works, and I don't have to read.
ReplyDeleteI'll save you the eye strain, OT: there is NO understanding women.
ReplyDeleteAt all.
@ iNews, thank you.
ReplyDelete@ Tony, that is good advice.
@ Simple Dude, that right there is classic.
@ Drake, good point.
@ Lurker, very true. And hence why there is more than one volume.
@ Rosie, those are just a start.
@ Lass, HA.
@ Lost, good advice right there.
@ Katsidhe, you bet your ass there is eye strain the book is all written in very fine print.
Understanding woman is similar to our government trying to balance the budget. ;~)
ReplyDeleteTo Rosie's list i would add: backrubs, oral sex and sweet talk. Not necessarily in that order. ;)
ReplyDeleteI feel like you had a subliminal joke in there.
ReplyDelete@ Nubian, good point.
ReplyDelete@ Dawn, I am good all at three of those things. Not so much on the diamonds though.
@ Copy, of course there is.
She's right, I'm wrong. Understood!
ReplyDeleteThat must be just the chapter on dealing with PMS right? haha.
ReplyDeleteOh come on OT - you read my blog! It's the MEN that are hard to figure out! Gawd when it comes down to it all I want is honesty, authenticity and some attention. That isn't so difficult, is it?
ReplyDeleteKelly @ http://myjoyproject.blogspot.com/
@ Vinny, good man.
ReplyDelete@ Barb, you said it.
@ Kelly, I am very easy to figure out. Feed me and screw me and I am good. lmao
Okie dokie - I eagerly await the book review.
ReplyDeleteAn exercise in futility. We don't understand ourselves. But maybe that's just me...
ReplyDeleteI bought the DVD collection series when it comes to understanding men... I am on the 218th hour and have decided it would be much easier to just become gay!
ReplyDeleteGood luck with that. If you crack the code, you will be the first man in the history of the world.
ReplyDelete@ Shelby, ok.
ReplyDelete@ Vixen, I am glad you got the joke.
@ Tracy, you are not the first woman to say that.
@ Cajun, there is a first time for everything right?
hahaha. I am laughing so damned hard. I promise you that 12,743 of those pages are just reworded repeats of the first 2 pages! Loved this post!
ReplyDeletehaha all you need to know is feed us chocolate and answer "yes dear" to whatever we say and all is good.
ReplyDeleteEveryday Life
OT, I think Jewels was the editor of that book from the sound of it.
ReplyDeleteOh OT... if only all men were as uncomplicated as you :)
ReplyDeleteOr if only you lived in Victoria! lol
Kelly http://myjoyproject.blogspot.com/
@ Jewels, you are probably right.
ReplyDelete@ Becca, sometimes that works sometimes it does not.
@ George, you may very well have stumbled upon the truth.
@ Kelly, sorry I don't live closer. lol
Brat! lol Women may use too many words, but men don't use near enough. I mean, were you taught to talk in code by the CIA at birth or something? ;)
ReplyDeleteGreat post!
Oh how my hubby and dad would agree with you!
ReplyDeleteCBG
canadianbloggergirl.blogspot.com
You like the mystery. As soon as we become predictable, you're bored. Put the book away.
ReplyDeleteUmmm....I don't get it.
ReplyDeleteJK - love the post!
@ Virgin, I know how to communicate. I can't vouch for everyone else.
ReplyDelete@ Canadian, I am sure they would.
@ Jen, sometimes. Not all of the time.
@ Janie, yes you do. lol
I'm sure there's an app for that. Ditch the book and get your manly self out there amongst the ladies!
ReplyDeleteWow, somebody was able to write a book?
ReplyDeleteJT you're a dork! hahaha I loved this!
ReplyDeleteVolume 1 :)
ReplyDeletedont waste your time. women are all different and the fact that some women claims to know what all women want just makes her even less trustworthy. You need assistance with a women? ask her or ask me. I am the master of all things after all.
@ Empress, that might just be an app for that.
ReplyDelete@ Teach, yep.
@ Yvonne, of course I am.
@ Mack, that is another good point.
I can't tell if this post is serious or not, but if it is, then it's probably wise that you never try to understand woman. In fact, we are all different anyway so it would be quite impossible.
ReplyDelete@ Sarah, this whole post was sarcasm. I know there is no point in trying to understand women because they don't even understand themselves. lol
ReplyDeleteIt is available on the kindle.
ReplyDeleteYou just have to buy the special edition 100 petabyte version!