All About Oil

I figured since I work in the oil and gas industry that I would take a little time to educate you a little bit about oil. Especially since what the media tends to tell you about this industry is complete and utter bullshit 90% of the time.

Most people think that the only thing which comes from oil is gasoline and motor oil. That is not really all that comes from oil. A multitude of stuff is made from oil and has been for a really long time including stuff that you probably had no idea is made with or from crude oil.

The standard unit of measure when talking about oil is the barrel, which is 42 gallons. Of the 42 gallons of oil in barrel, here is the breakdown of what it is used to make.

19.4 gallons – gasoline

10.04 gallons – diesel

3.91 gallons – jet fuel

1.68 gallons – heavy fuel oil

1.24 gallons – heating oil

1.72 gallons – liquefied petroleum gases

6.80 gallons – other products

Now I know that the total here adds up to above 42 gallons, and that is because the process used to refine crude oil into something useful gets out more than the original amount. Pretty neat huh?

But what I really wanted to inform you about is the 6.80 gallons of crude oil that goes into making “other products”. Some of the products made from this portion of a barrel of crude oil are either made directly from the crude oil, or the crude oil is involved in some form or fashion of making the compounds used to make these other products.

Here is a nice little list of stuff made into these so called “other products”: cold cream, fan belts, refrigerators, movie film, car enamel, golf balls, contact lenses, shaving cream, toothpaste, drinking cups, ammonia, solvents, ink, upholstery, tires, dresses, cassettes, motor cycle helmets, cd players, curtains, vitamin capsules, dashboards, putty, percolators, skis, tool racks, mops, umbrellas, roofing, denture adhesive, speakers, tennis rackets, nylon rope, water pipes, shampoo, guitar strings, antifreeze, clothes, combs, vaporizers, heart valves, enamel, anesthetics, dentures, floor wax, sweaters, car bodies, bicycle tires, dishwasher parts, caulking, faucet washers, food preservatives, antihistamines, cortisone, dyes, life jackets, tv cabinets, car battery cases, slacks, yarn, toilet seats, linoleum, synthetic wood, rubber cement, candles, hand lotion, wheels, luggage, football helmets, toothbrushes, cd’s, dvd’s, balloons, crayons, pillows, artificial turf, model cars, motor oil, ballpoint pens, boats, nail polish, golf bags, tool boxes, petroleum jelly, antiseptics, basketballs, purses, deodorant, panty hose, rubbing alcohol, shag rugs, epoxy, insect repellent, fertilizers, fishing rods, ice cube trays, electric blankets, fishing boots, trash bags, roller skates, paint rollers, aspirin, awnings, ice chests, paint brushes, sun glasses, parachutes, dishes, artificial limbs, folding doors, bearing grease, football cleats, insecticides, fishing lures, perfumes, show polish, tape, clotheslines, soap, shoes, footballs, refrigerant, linings, electrician’s tape, paint, oil filters, hair coloring, lipstick, synthetic rubber, glycerin, dice, house paint, surf boards, shower curtains, safety glasses, eyeglasses, detergents, tents, telephones, cameras, bandages, and hair curlers.

That is just a list of roughly 100 or so of the products that are made from crude oil. There are THOUSANDS of products which are made either directly or indirectly from crude oil. And this does not include any of the associated natural gas or condensate related products which come from the gas phase during oil and gas production.

So why did I tell you all of this you ask? So that you can see that more comes from oil other than gasoline or travel related stuff. Plus in some of my upcoming posts I will refer you back to this post as well.

And if you are one of the anti-oil people, try living without all of the products that I listed above. Because unless you are Amish (and if you are Amish, chances are you are not reading this post), you are using crude oil. You don't hear the "environmentalists" talking about how they are "living like the Amish" when they lecture you about the evil oil and gas industry.

My Take On The TSA

Last week I told you about my humorous story of how you can talk to your kids about getting fondled by the TSA. Well here are my serious thoughts about the TSA and some of the hypocrisy involved with them and our government.

Now unless you have been living under a rock for the last month you have heard about the wonderful new screening procedures at the US airports. It basically goes like this; you can get scanned by their new “high tech” body scanner or you can opt out of going through the scanner and get the full body pat down. Or you can go through the scanner and if they find something you will get the full body pat down. Now I am going to break this down with some common sense.



The scanners emit radiation much like an x-ray machine and the government says that they are safe. Can you believe the government? Of course you can’t believe them and everyone knows this. How many times has the government said that something was safe, and then later it does a double take and says that it is not safe? I can name a few for you. Remember the artificial sweeteners from the 80’s that they said were safe, and then latter said caused cancer? How about DDT and Agent Orange? What about all of the medications that they said were safe and later recalled? What about the tooth paste made in China, or the toys from China? See my point.

Everyone has to go through these procedures. The pilots have to go through this procedure multiple times a day. Why make the pilots go through this procedure looking for a gun or some other weapon? Did you forget that they are pilots and could at will crash any plane into anything that they wanted at any given time? Seems like a waste of their time to screen them as if they are intent on killing people with an airplane, the screener won’t catch that.

The government has said that all the TSA employees are good people. Yet in the past we have heard of TSA agents who were convicted sex offenders having the job of screeners. Yes that is correct. If the government can’t even know who the fuck is working for them and screen them, do you really have any faith in anything that they do which is security related (like the no fly list for example) like screening.

The government has also said that the images from the body scanners are not kept and are destroyed. Well then how come all of these damn images are showing up all over the internet? Yep someone is getting access to them or the TSA agents themselves are not all “good” people as you have told us they are. In either case, the images are not secure.

As I said you can opt out of going through the scanner and having a full body pat down to check you for weapons. So some guy can shove a homemade C4 bomb up his ass and by opting out of the scanner he would only get the pat down which does not check the rectum. So in theory you could smuggle a bomb onto a plane this way. Seems like a dumb ass thing to do to allow people to opt out of the scanner.

The TSA scans the passengers, the airports randomly screens the checked baggage, yet the cargo (mail and packages) does not get scanned. This was one of the major points in the 9/11 commission report. So if you wanted to blow up an airplane all you have to do is mail a bomb and time it to explode while the plane is in the air. Why scan the passengers and their baggage if you don’t scan the mail and cargo? Do you not remember hearing about the FedEx and UPS planes recently having bombs on board? Are the meal carts scanned because you sure as fuck could smuggle a weapon on plane that way couldn’t you. There are so many ways to get something on a plane it is not even funny.


I think that the TSA and the government should use profiling in doing the screenings to some extent. Now all of you are saying “Well Mr. Trash racial profiling and profiling is illegal and we can’t do it,” and I say bullshit. Police forces use profiling all the damn time. Every time a woman is murdered who is it that the police look at first? It is the husband, boyfriend, ex-husband, and ex-boyfriend that get looked at first. That is profiling and the police use it. Anytime there is a serial killer or some mail bomber who is it that they are looking for? It is a white male, early to late 30’s, lives alone or with their mom, is educated, and has problems being social with people. Yes that is profiling and the police use it. So use some common sense here in the airports and use profiling. It is Muslim men who are the ones trying to do the bad things on and to airplanes and their passengers. Look at the picture of the 9/11 hijackers, do you see a 3 year old black boy? Do you see a 65 year old white grandmother? No you don’t. Use some common sense in doing the screenings and look for the people who are actually doing the shit that you are trying to prevent.

Contact the Israelis and ask them what they are doing right with their airline El Al. They have not had a hijacking since the mid to late 1970’s. So I would find out what they are doing to prevent chicken shit terrorists from getting on their planes. Now I know that they have a fraction of the airports and daily flights that the US does, but still you could learn something from them. Most of the world hates them and wants to see their destruction so they are always on their toes security wise and have a system in place to prevent any problems with their airline.

I just think common sense should be used in stuff like this. Well really in damn near fucking anything in world should be done with common sense. Let me tell you a little story which can illustrate this better. Back in 2002 I was flying home from Brazil for Christmas on Christmas Eve. I was flying home first class (I used my frequent flyer miles to do so) and as the first to board the plane, I noticed who was around me. There was me, two white guys from the same town I was working in, an old white grandmother, and a middle aged Muslim man dressed in the garb. Guess what 4 people got the random search in the Rio airport, that’s right, the 4 non-Muslims going home to celebrate a Christian holiday. Now who of the people in first class would you suspect of causing trouble with terrorism? I did find it funny that when I was joking about that fact with the other people in first class, that the Captain of the flight had come out of the cockpit wearing a camouflage hunting jacket and a “I Love To Hunt” camouflage hat on. I knew we were getting home safely after seeing that the captain was a redneck hunter.

I also find it funny that the ACLU completely fucking silent when it comes to this issue of the scanners and the pat downs. The only time it is legal in this country to be searched like this is when you are being arrested. So why is it that the ACLU is silent? Oh yea that is right, the ACLU does not mind rights violations as long as it is a Democrat that has put the practice into law. Do you remember how vocal the ACLU was when Bush got the Patriot Act passed? Can you imagine how vocal the ACLU would be if it was Bush who had the TSA doing pat downs on people like they are now?

Do you remember the shoe bomber who attempted to ignite a bomb which was concealed in his shoe? The only thing which stopped him was the passengers on the plane who got up and stopped him when he was observed trying to ignite the bomb. Do you remember the Christmas Day bomber from last year who tried to ignite a bomb on a plane which was concealed in his underwear? He was also stopped by passengers around him who were not going to be blown up with some damn terrorist. And then Homeland Security head Janet Napolitano said that the system worked. Bullshit you ignorant woman, the system did not work. The system would have worked if this asshole was caught before he boarded the airplane. If the “system” is the passengers stopping terrorists, we are truly fucked.

I guess what I am trying to say is that common sense should be used in trying to stop terrorists from doing what they want to do. At the end of the day though if you don’t want to be felt up, then don’t fly. And also you can’t really stop someone from doing bad if their mind is dead set on doing evil. But since common sense is never used by our government, don’t be shocked to see Congressman Barney Frank feeling up the men, Ellen Degeneres feeling up the women, and someone like Michael Jackson feeling up your kids.

Great Inventions #2

Here are some more great inventions that I think have brought happiness to the world since I have been born.

GPS.

I think that GPS or the Tom-Tom or whatever you want to call it, has helped a lot of clueless people out. No not me as I was born with GPS, but other poor hapless souls who are piss poor with directions. Think about it, you can have a little box on your dashboard which you can easily see and it also tells your dumb ass you when to turn left. Or right. I mean it is just as good for going on long trips or going somewhere locally that you have never gone before. I think though with all of the time that these handy little things have saved women people by not being lost, why is dinner still always done late?


The Internet.

Even though I hate to give credit to Al Gore, I would have to say that this is the greatest invention of all time. Just look at the wealth of information out there on the internet, not to mention the stuff you can do from home. You can change your address, renew your driver’s license (and not have to wait in line behind 30 unclean nasty people and deal with the angry government worker), read the news, shop, cyber stalk, research for papers, etc. So many things that you used to have to actually leave your house to do. You can read news from far far away, follow up on your favorite sports team, and keep in touch with friends and family. I could write a thousand things about how great the internet is.


Digital Cameras.

As an avid photographer my whole life, I think that the digital camera has affected me the most as a technology. I love taking pictures everywhere I go of vacations, friends, my kids and their adventures, scenery and pretty much anything and everything. I used to spend a ton of money on getting film developed, and now I spend very little money on printing off pictures. Yes I understand that the film industry has lost a lot of money with the invention of digital camera and essentially gone out of business, but it was worth it to me. You can even take naughty pictures now and not have to worry about getting them developed anymore. Hell that was the whole reason for the creation of the Polaroid. Plus with digital pictures combined with the internet it can make sharing pictures with family and friends so easy. Can anyone tell me the last time they actually used snail mail to send a picture to someone? Such a great invention the digital camera was.


Well I think that should be enough to keep your mouth watering for a while. Keep an eye out for another post in my series of great inventions.

Great Inventions

I think that in my short lifetime that there have been some really great inventions. So I am going to say a little about some of them that I think are influential (well at least to me).


The iPod.

When I was a kid I had hundreds of cassette tapes and hundreds of vinyl records because I loved music and also because I was a DJ. I did private parties, weddings, and of course my own house parties. Anytime I had a gig, I had to haul around hundreds of pounds of gear, equipment, and the vinyl. Then came cd’s and I had to get everything I had on vinyl and cassette and go buy it on cd. So many years go by and I have hundreds of cds and any time I take a road trip, I have to take tons of cds with me. So skip ahead to today with the invention of the mp3 players, I got an 80gb iPod years ago and loaded up all my cd’s and cassettes onto to it and I love it. I can take thousands of hours of music with me anywhere I go and play them and only have to carry one small little iPod. If I only still was a DJ, life would be very easy now as they have mixers which can accommodate iPods. But the iPod has saved my life at work as I listen to music all day and it makes the day go by faster.


Smart Phones.

Remember the old cell phones which had a car battery sized battery back that you had to lug around everywhere? You know the ones with the 1970’s monochrome red Radioshak calculator display? Well today cell phones are small, very small and getting smaller all the time. And they have all of these great features as well now. You can look at the internet, listen to games, text message, find directions to places, order food, and a million other things. Can you imagine how much more fun church would have been when we were kids if we had smart phones back then? You could play games, chat with other friends stuck in church as well, play on Facebook, and download pictures of hot nuns all from you pew.


Remote Controls.

I remember when I was a kid and my parents would make me go change the channel. Or go turn the tv volume up or down. I hated that shit. Then we got a tv that had a remote, but it had a cable attached to the tv, but it was only 10 foot long. And this new remote did not reach my dad’s spot on the couch, so I still had to get up and change the damn channel. Then many years later when we moved to Texas we got a nice new tv that had a remote which was a true wireless remote. It was great as I no longer had to get up to turn the volume up or down and to turn the tv off. But the cable tv box had a dial which still had to manually be changed so I still had to get the fuck up to change the channel for my lazy ass parents. Then after many years the cable company caught up with the tv companies wireless remotes. Then some more years go by and we finally got a cable box which had a wireless remote. I was in HEAVEN as I no longer had to get up and change the channel for my parents. Or so I thought, by then I was then old enough to be forced to make them each a mixed drink. Oh and instead of getting up to change the channels for them or turn the tv volume up or down after all the remotes were in our house, do you know what they had the nerve to do? You guessed it, my lazy fucking parents would ask me, “Hey can you hand me the remote that is on the tv?”


I will have some more posts about some of the things in which I think are great inventions and also some of the things which I think had no business ever being made. Stay tuned.