A recipe of blurbs by a hungry dad-filled with sarcasm, truth, and a dash of that rare ingredient, common sense.

Tuesday, June 28, 2011

Hey Blogger, Can I Ask You A Question?

Dear Blogger,

I know that we have already had a couple of chats now. We talked about how you got drunk one night and didn’t show up to work and we have talked about how you could improve yourself.

I want to now talk to you about awards.

I love getting awards from my followers and posting about them. Most of the awards are given out in such a way that you know why you are getting them and how you were chosen to receive said awards.

I am just curious about how you go about BON’ing people. You know the Blogs Of Note that you post about. How do you go about picking a blog for this distinguished honor? I have looked at a lot of the blogs that you have BON’d and I can’t find a single way that you pick them.

I have noticed that the number of followers can be very low or very high for a blog that you pick. Some of the blogs have a lot of posts and some of them have very little posts. I have seen that some of the blogs you have picked have just started blogging and some have been around for years. I have also noticed that you pick some blogs that are here on blogger and others that are not even related to blogger.

Some of the blogs have been worthy of being BON’d while some of the others have not in my mind been worthy. I mean you BON’d the Netflix blog for fucks sake.

Can you just tell me how you go about picking a blog to be BON’d? Because I can’t for the life of me figure out your selection process. Do you just get drunk and blindly pick them or is there some actual process that you go through?

We are all curious.

Thanks a lot.

Your Pal,

Oilfield Trash


  1. Wow...the netflix blog? No...surely not. I stopped paying attention because clearly they don't know what the fuck they're doing! It isn't even worth my time. They obviously have no standing criteria and don't BON worthy blogs...I mean, neither you nor I have been chosen. Right?!

  2. Well said....keep us posted on the response, please!

  3. I don't understand it either. there really is no rhyme or reason for their selection.

    The Netflix one really pissed off a lot of people--myself included.

  4. I have asked these questions myself. Some of the ones chosen I just go OMG.
    I really don't want to be BON'd for that reason. Seems like 90% are shockers

  5. Yeah, I'd like the answer for this one too.

  6. hahaha.. i have wondered the same thing for years!!! :-)

  7. Probably a dartboard and a monkey.

  8. Excellent question! I hope Blogger has the decency to answer your very legitimate question because I'm with you...there seems to be NO rhyme or reason as to why a blog is selected. I vote for you OT!!!

  9. Dear Make Daddy A Sammich

    We BON’d Blog’s purely on a basis that they are the ones most likely to mess with your head

    . 5,000 followers and don’t need any help – guaranteed to get a good BON’ding

    . No followers and on a niche subject that not even the owner can be bothered to read -110% guaranteed to get BON’d

    . If you have an Interesting blog but just not made it into the public eye….forget about it.

    tThis is not a public service for you the readers this is an entertainment for us the centre of your blogging world. Never forget Big Blogger is watching you….

  10. I've really wondered that myself. What do people need to do to get BON'd (sophomoric aside: I love the acronym "BON'd". Makes me giggle in a junior high kinda way). For instance, your blog should be so honored. But, hey, bright side: I love to acknowledge everyone who comments and really try to read all my followers' posts. If my blog were to get BON'd (I LOVE that), then I would presumably have a whole bunch of followers to whom (I don't think it's 'who') I couldn't respond. It's a two-edge sword, I guess.
    And I don't even know who (now I KNOW it's not 'whom.' I think) are the bosses at Blogger. Do they exist? Are they in some sort of star chamber? Or are they like the Great Oz?
    Okay, gotta go finish cleaning my deck now.

  11. Dood, they will not tell you. I have tried asking multiple times, I've tried searching, Googling, asking people who have been BON'ed.... nobody seems to fucking know. It drives me crazy.

  12. hope you get BON'd soon... you deserve it.

  13. SD, CBG, Amber LaShell and I all discussed this very thing on the Twitter one day. We arrived at the conclusion that your blog must be about discovering Alpine birds and that it may or may not have words. Glad I could help.

  14. I'm not sure but I think it may involve a blind monkey throwing darts at a wall with the names of all the blogs written on it. Just a guess.

  15. I never check that thing so I haven't a clue who's getting BON'd around here.
    Maybe they just pick one out of a hat.

  16. No kidding. I've stopped looking at the BON'd blogs because most of them suck. A lot. So who knows how it works.

  17. It’s really quite simple: there are thirty judges which make up a council, each of which has their own idea of what constitutes a blog of note. The council is segregated into six sections – one for each key signature (there’s an extra one, but I won’t get into that). The sections voting system involves using random number generators to correspond with each phase of the moon, unless it’s a leap year.

    All clear now?

  18. I sometimes use images that have questionable sources. A lot of times I use original content, but sometimes I do not.

    I doubt I'll ever get BON'd because of that very reason.

  19. And some of the blogs they've picked haven't posted in a year or longer.

  20. I honestly don't even look at who they pick anymore. I looked when I first started and found that "blogs of note" was really just code for, "blogs not interesting to Paul." I really don't know why that is...

  21. @ Daffy, yes the netflix blog was one of the BON chosen a while back. And yes I agree with you, we have not been chosen.

    @ Kmcaffee, I will never get a response.

    @ Katsidhe, yep is pissed me off as well.

    @ Lurker, hence this post.

    @ Mynx, you might be onto something.

    @ Yandie, you and me both.

    @ Mama, yep.

    @ Joshua, and a bottle of tequila.

    @ Randomgirl, thank you for the nomination.

    @ Lass, I think it is as well.

    @ BlackLog, that is the best answer I have seen yet.

    @ Al, I think they are like the wizard of Oz.

    @ Cake, it is like the tootsie roll pop question I think.

    @ Rosie, thank you.

    @ Frogs, thank you.

    @ Vinny, you might be correct.

    @ Ruth, possibly.

    @ Sara, I am getting to that point.

    @ Drake, that might be right.

    @ Lost, keep your head up you might get it one day.

    @ TS, exactly.

    @ Paul, good point.

  22. Me and you both!!! I am thinking that if I don't have an artsy fartsy or foreign blog (no, mine doesn't count) I am out of luck. Who knows, maybe one day we will both get lucky and get Bon'ed. Wait, that doesn't sound right!

  23. I imagine it's all about blowjobs.

  24. Good question. I don't even look at them. Not interested... AT ALL!

  25. only Blogger can tell you because when I got the B.O.N. I was totally in shock and didn't even know what the fuck it was...you're deserving, I am going to see if I can pull some strings

  26. I'd really like to know the answer. I also think that Anna has hit it on the head (pun intended).

  27. @ Texa, that does sound dirty. lol

    @ Anna, ok you win best comment for this round.

    @ Melissa, good point.

    @ Ryan, I did not know you had been BON'd. That is pretty cool. YAY for you. That makes two people I follow who have been BON'd.

    @ George, I agree.

  28. haha! BONed.

    i haven't even looked at the blogs of note page in months and months, because generally speaking i don't often find any that interest me. though that could be because i am a freak.

    it does seem, however, that they just select every single blog that is nominated, regardless of it's contents.

  29. Three words. Random Number Generator.
    That's my guess.

  30. Q: can you BON yourself?
    'cause i tried a few times...
    & it's not the same as when someone else does it to you.

    just sayin'

  31. @ Kage, I can agree with you there.

    @ Danger, possibly you are correct.

    @ Brandy, probably.

    @ Violet, it can be the same as someone else but you have to hit your hand with a hammer a few times first and then it feels like someone else. lol

  32. My favourite BONer was the one where some lady post various drawings of birds that she does....


  33. Pencil Girl sent a bunch of us over here, saying you're a straightforward person who's not afraid of the truth.

    I also often look at the blogs of note. I found a cute one once, about hand-made mouse figurines and their stories. But I do think most of these blogs are not hand-picked, as they say... More like foot-picked.

    I will be following.

  34. I don't even look at the Blogs of Note, in fact I never even knew it existed until Simple Dude got bon'd... and after he was bon'd then I started for about two weeks looking at them, and then I yawned and said forget about it.

    Listen you don't need to be bon'd (not that you are asking), look at all the bloody comments you get.... You are loved by the masses already! I am lucky if I get freaking 5 comments per post. just saying my friend!

  35. The whole BON'ing this is so perplexing! I've tried bribes (naked photos, bj's, alcohol, etc.) and nothing seems to work with those Blogger jacktards. They also ignore my tweets regarding this particular query. While I would love to get BON'ed and increase my follower base, there are very few blogs that have been BON'ed that I actually read. Maybe we are better off not having gotten the nod from the Blogger bozos.

  36. @ Joy, exactly.

    @ Lavi, thanks for coming over. Yep I am full of the truth over here.

    @ Tracy, I used to look and pay attention to them until they started getting weird.

    @ Empress, Oh how I know. You have been complaining about it as long as I have.

  37. I am convinced that the "Blogger" who "BON's" people is a male with very little taste...like a frat boy with beer goggles after a heavy night of partying. No accounting for taste or what the hell he wakes up to the next morning.

  38. i'm curious now to because if the empress can't bribe them then i'm afraid of what it may take..

  39. I've never really looked at the BON. Should I be? It sounds like I'm not missing anything except maybe an explanation of the mating habits of the stinkbug or something like that...

  40. I totally agree! Some of the chosen ones, I look at and think, "Seriously?" Meh! Let me know if you get a response. ;)

  41. I'm so with you on this one. Even the random theory doesn't cut it with me because if it WERE random they'd have to have more good ones but no, they are consistently awful for the most part.

    I've only found 3 that were worth the effort to follow that I know have been boned. And only found 2 of those through the BON page. I will say that all three ARE excellent blogs.

    And I don't mean to leave you out Ryan, but I've not seen your blog yet, I'll fix that shortly.

    But only 3 when I've searched through MONTHS and months of entries LOOKING for something interesting, and still do a random month here and there just for kicks.

    I do have my own theory. I think the BONers of Blogger have their collective heads shoved up their ASS while their doing their choosing. Once in a great while they come up for air and someone has a kneejerk reflex and chooses while out in the real world and THAT'S where the good picks come from.

  42. @ Reck, you might have just nailed it.

    @ Becca, exactly.

    @ Laughingmom, I think you are not missing anything based on peoples comments here.

    @ Yvonne, I am glad you agree.

    @ Sally, I think you are onto something.

  43. It's got to be random. I've found a few really good blogs that way, but other times, I feel like I'm the one that got BONED for taking the time to look at some of the inane stuff out there. And they didn't even buy me dinner first...

  44. So odd that you post about being BON'd here, and the very next day, having not read this amazing post which is very truthful in my eyes (along with all the commenters) that I come up with the idea of being CANUCK'd and saying "To hell with Blogger".

    Let us unite as one and win!


  45. @ Pat, you are probably right. I have seen some good ones get BON'd and some not so good ones. But your take on it is spot on.

    @ Canadian, yes that is very ironic. And yes we should unite as one.

  46. Dear OT,

    I give the award to those bloggers that send me a picture of their weiner, vagina or breasts. Send me a pic of your wang and you will be BON'd.


  47. I think there are so many blogs that truly deserve to be BON'd, yours being one of them. It shouldn't matter the number of followers, but rather the message and passion--whether it's because of humor, heart, etc.

  48. @ Toastman, is that really all it takes? lol

    @ Virgin, thank you very much.


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