Here is another post from my series “Thoughts Of A Jackass” where I share with you some of my funny or smart ass posts on Facebook.
I was in Game Stop last night with the kids when I noticed that they had a "Michael Jackson:The Experience" PS3 game. How can it be a Michael Jackson game and not come with Jesus juice, one glove, a monkey, and an inflatable 9 year old boy?
I think all of the people who are against abortion should be forced to eat dinner at least once in their life at a Cici's Pizza.
For those of you that are sad that the rapture didn't come, cheer up it's not the end of the world.
I wonder if Arnold Schwarzenegger would have made his mistress have an abortion would he have said right after the procedure, "Hasta La Vista, Baby".
No rapture huh? There went my plan of looting Specs Liquor and Best Buy.
Ladies and gentlemen, that sound you hear is thunder. The stuff you see falling from the sky is rain. Yes I know these two events combined are something you have not seen in many many months, but it is not the end of the world.
Post rapture party starts tonight around 7pm at a yet to be determined strip club since I am fairly certain the strippers will still be here after 6pm.
Dear Monday, can you please do all of us a favor and go fuck yourself. Thanks.
If Muslims could smell this ham that is cooking in my oven, I am pretty sure they would re-think that whole "I can't eat a pig" thing.
After being outside playing with my kids all day I have come to a conclusion. They really need to make Big Wheels for adults.
Al-Qaida on Friday confirmed the killing of Osama bin Laden and warned of retaliation, saying Americans' "happiness will turn to sadness". - I was married once; there is nothing that Al-Qaida can do to me that was worse than my marriage.
These rain clouds are more teasing than a stripper in the club on a Friday night. Do I have to wave a few dollar bills to get some rain?
How is Christina Aquilera on a damn singing show when she can't even sing a simple song like the National Anthem?
The only thing the damn Easter Bunny left me was the bill for all of the shit the kids got and the bill for the meal that I have to cook. Thanks you little fucker, when I catch you I am making stew out of your ass.
I wonder if Muslim men get to see their future bride without the burka on before the wedding. I mean imagine the surprise when you get home after the wedding, and pull off the burka for the first time, and she looks like Sarah Jessica Parker on a bad day.
Well until next time…..