A recipe of blurbs by a hungry dad-filled with sarcasm, truth, and a dash of that rare ingredient, common sense.

Wednesday, June 29, 2011

My Weiner Has A First Name

It is Anthony.

You remember that song for the Oscar Meyer hot dogs right?

Anyways, if you did not already know it Congressman Anthony Weiner (no joke here that is really his name) was recently busted for sending naughty pictures of his weiner to a large number of ladies across America.

First it came out that he had sent a topless picture of himself to a college student in Washington State. When that hit the news, Weiner said that his phone was hacked and someone sent it to the lady.


Then he came out of said that the picture was not him and that someone stole his phone and sent it. Yet he never contacted police.

A week later it came out that he sent more nekkid pictures of himself to a woman here in Texas. He then denied it and said that it was not him.


Later on he said the picture may have been him, but someone else had sent it.

After another week more women came forward with pictures of his weiner that Weiner had sent to them. One woman even had a transcript of his yahoo chat with him.

Weiner then came out and admitted that he had lied the whole time and that he was sorry he had done it. What he meant to say was that he was sorry that he got caught.

He then said he was going to check himself into rehab for what happened. I laughed because I did not know that they could treat “dumbass” in rehab. He should have taken his 534 colleagues from Congress with him if they can indeed treat “dumbass”.

And a couple of weeks ago Weiner resigned from Congress.

Now I am not mad at him for sending pictures of his weiner to ladies, I mean whatever floats your boat. I am not even mad at him for lying to the public during his press conference. I mean if you look at the job description for a politician it has lie, cheat, and steal as numbers one through three for their responsibilities.

I am mad at him for not being a better liar. I mean we hold politicians to a very high standard of lying here in this country. His lies were pretty weak in my opinion. He went through the trouble to lie to the American people, why didn’t he lie to the women he was sending a picture of his weiner to? Hasn’t this guy ever heard of a fake yahoo email address or about lying about who you are online? You could lie to us but not the skanks you emailed your weiner to? Weiner has no common sense when it comes to lying and this is why he should have resigned instead the reasons he listed for doing so.

I am also a little mad at him because he was married. He has a smoking hot wife at home and he was sexting with multiple women and taking pictures of his weiner and sending it to them. If I was married to that hot lady, my penis would never be out of her vagina long enough to take a picture of it. Here is another man in a position of power cheating on his lady (yes what he did is cheating in my book), and a beautiful lady at that. Sheesh.


I do find all of this very funny though given that his last name is Weiner. You couldn’t write better shit than this if you were comedian. On a side note, Anthony Weiner looks a lot like Beavis don't you think?


49 comments:

  1. with a nose and name like that one wonders if his mother really loved him.

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  2. *Gasp* You're so right! They DO look alike. And I have wondered why all of these guys with hot wives dilly dally with err...not so lovely ladies. Is it some psychological thing, where they know deep inside that they are scuzzballs and feel it necessary to wallow in the mud cuz that's what they deserve? Or have I been watching Dr Phil too much.

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  3. omg!! he does look like Bevis!!! thats hilarious!

    His wife is hot.. are the chics he was sending pics to at least as hot??

    and i love the phrase "f I was married to that hot lady, my penis would never be out of her vagina long enough to take a picture of it."

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  4. I don't know that receiving wiener pics necessarily renders one a 'Skank' especially if, as I understand it, some of them were not solicited.

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  5. Not sure about the looks, but he sure as hell acts like a Beavis.

    I think it's a survival of the fittest thing... the good liars get to stay in Congress while the shitty ones get weeded out by scandal.

    Not sure that means good things for our country though.

    SD
    Build A Better Blog!

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  6. I just found the quote of the day! "If I was married to that hot lady, my penis would never be out of her vagina long enough to take a picture of it"

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  7. I don't hate him (well, I've thought he was a tool...err...weiner) for quite a long time.
    Actually, I'm grateful to him. He gave us soooo much material.
    Way to go, Congressman! Keep those gags coming (hee hee hee....I said 'coming').

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  8. @ Lurker, yep.

    @ Lass, good point there. I never thought about that.

    @ Mama, yes he does look a lot like Beavis.

    @ Yandie, from what I understand the first woman did not send any back of herself. But the rest of them (from what I have seen on the news) knew who he was and that he was married and in turn sent pics of themselves back to him. That is the women I am referring to as skanks.

    @ Simpledude, I think your point makes a lot of sense.

    @ Randomgirl, thank you very much. Glad you liked it.

    @ Al, I don't hate him either. He has given us some great material.

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  9. Holy shit. Looks exactly like Beavis.

    I have 3 fake email addresses. Just sayin'.

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  10. An AWFUL lot like Beavis, now that you mention it...

    And I laughed when you expressed your disappointment in his shoddy lies. :-) The Mel Brooks' line from Blazing Saddles: We need to protect our phoney baloney jobs here gentlemen! sprang to mind...

    Pearl

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  11. He's married to Divia from Royal Pains? Why would you ever cheat on that??

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  12. I just don't think its that big of a deal other than the lying and cheating part but you expect that of politicians. I'm sure if it wasn't for that beautiful lady at his side, that he'd have some of those chicks nudey pics on his phone and interwebs as well.

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  13. @ Rotten, yep.

    @ Pearl, yes he does. And that line from Blazing Saddles fits perfectly. I don't know why I didn't think of that.

    @ Lost, exactly.

    @ Brandy, I don't think it is a big deal either. It didn't shock me at all.

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  14. Soooo much like Beavis! That is creepy. I mean, really, jokes aren't even written this good. Weiner weiner. Loser, lol

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  15. They do look alike.
    Why does everybody that gets caught cheating go to rehab now?
    The bad liar still was in congress long enough to earn his $1 million pension.

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  16. And his smoking hot wife is pregnant. What a douche.

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  17. @ Texa, yes he does.

    @ Ruth, I agree.

    @ Joshua, yep.

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  18. Oh, how I wish there were dumbass rehabs all over the country. The world would be a better place. And yes, he does suck at lying. He could have stuck with the part about somebody stealing his phone, but could have copped to taking the pics and said they were for his wife since they have such a smoking hot relationship.

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  19. "I'd never take my penis out of her vagina long enough to take pictures of it." Classic!!
    Beavis =Weiner. Absolutely.

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  20. As Ron White says "You Can't Fix Stupid". Great post.

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  21. My favorite is the look-a-like comparison at the end. Spot on!! Found you through Vive le Nerd's blogroll. Glad I did.

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  22. "I did not know that they could treat “dumbass” in rehab." A classic line if I ever heard one. I'll be using it, count on it...
    He not only looks like Beavis, he IS Beavis.

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  23. Uncanny resemblance. Is there a Butthead to his Bevis lurking someplace?

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  24. This has been all over the media and even here in Canada I'm sick of hearing about this guy.

    I have NO tolerance for cheaters!


    He does have a remarkabe resemblance to Bevis though!

    CBG
    canadianbloggergirl.blogspot.com

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  25. @ Mrs Hyde, you and me both. You and me both.

    @ Tony, yes he is. And he needs tp for his bunghole.

    @ TS, yes he does.

    @ Dawn, thank you.

    @ Barb, that is so true.

    @ Vixen, thanks for coming by. And yes he does.

    @ Pat, thank you very much.

    @ George, hmm maybe we need to look for him now.

    @ Canadian, I am sick of it as well, but it is so funny that I had to poke fun at it.

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  26. I'm mad that he got access to what looked like a slammin' congressional gym.

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  27. Thank you very much for the giggle. I couldn't believe how bad he was at lying myself. I do a better job than him! Sheesh.

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  28. The guy is a tool to be sure. You would think that his PR person would be on his ass keeping him in line. That is a bit crazy to be texting and involved with that many women. I am also SHOCKED that so many women were interested enough to engage in that kind of talk with him...he makes me throw up a little in my mouth. Nasty.

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  29. @ Copyboy, HA.

    @ Shelby, you are welcome.

    @ Jewels, I agree.

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  30. I hadn't looked at it that way, but you know, you are 100% correct. He's a bad liar. Which might actually make me look more favorably on him if it weren't for the stupidity of it.

    They do all lie, cheat, and steal. We all know that but only get mad at them for those things if they're on the "other" side. If they're on "our" side we only get mad at them for doing those things stupidly ... sigh, we doomed.

    And he DOES look like Bevis ... good catch.

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  31. Wiener is a major DICK. Enough said.

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  32. you're getting to this topic awfully late aren't you? I think the whole scandal is a scandal. How can his last name be Weiner? Find me a woman out there with the last name vagina.

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  33. It is totally your fault that I now have to clean beer off my computer screen....but I'm okay with that because the likeness is just that freakin' hilarious.

    He is a jackass.

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  34. @ Sally, exactly why I posted about it.

    @ Empress, yep you said it.

    @ Toastman, yes I know I am late but I still felt like posting about it.

    @ Bluz, that is perfect.

    @ Daffy, I am sorry. There is actually a disclaimer on my blog about it.

    @ Anna, exactly.

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  35. i adore huma abedin. i kinda hope she leaves him.

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  36. is it me, or does this douchebag look a smidge gay... and i guess "hot" partner doesn't equal fidelity.
    total tool.
    and a creepy one @ that.
    eek

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  37. @ Yvonne, yep. He could have learned some things from HC back in the day huh? lol

    @ Kage, I hope she leaves him as well.

    @ Mack, exactly.

    @ Violet, he just looks creepy to me.

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  38. What I want to know is why would you not change your last name when you turned 18? Why would you marry a man whose last name was Weiner? I just don't get it.

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  39. @ Cake, I sure as hell would have changed my last name the very same day I turned 18.

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  40. Holy! THEY DO LOOK ALIKE!! LOL Great post--well said.

    I agree--what he did amounted to cheating. Surely his wife isn't going to stay with that (insert word). She deserves much better than what he has given her.

    In that first pic of him--is that a little white sleeping kitten? I seriously feel bad for the kitten--it's just so wrong on so many levels.

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  41. @ Virgin, yes they do. Yes that was a kitten in the picture. He referred to it as his pussy in a text message.

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  42. You are a genious!!! Love the Weiner/Beavis pics!

    And I shall forever remember the quote, "If I was married to that hot lady, my penis would never be out of her vagina long enough to take a picture of it."

    Classic, dude, classic!

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