A recipe of blurbs by a hungry dad-filled with sarcasm, truth, and a dash of that rare ingredient, common sense.

Thursday, April 7, 2011

I Am A Winner!

I did not win the latest lottery drawing, but I did get myself awarded another blog award on Monday.

On Monday I was given the “Versatile Blogger Award” by Absolutely Primed over at Over Developed, Under Exposed. You should go check out her blog as she has a great blog and is also a pretty cool Canuck. Thank you very much for the award Primed.

I am not sure what the meaning behind the award is, but I guess it means that I am good at going from one totally goofy ass post to something serious. Hey come to think about it, that is pretty much how this blog actually is.

This little award comes with some rules (like all of them really) that must be “followed”.

1. Thank the person who gave it to me which was done above.

2. List seven random things about me which is done below.

3. Pass the award onto 15 other blogs. Well I am too tired to do this one and I think this award has already been spread around more the Snooki’s vagina. So yea I am not going to pass it on.

Well here is the seven random things about me:

1. I really shouldn’t bite my finger nails but I do. Especially in the car on the way to and from work, it is a bad habit and I know I need to stop doing it. Do they make a patch for this shit?

2. I own a cat. Don’t bash me for that, he is a “special” breed of cat and will be the subject of a future post.

3. I once worked as a life guard when I was a teenager. It took me three months of wearing SPF 500 to get a nice tan.

4. I coach basketball in a youth inner city league. I just finished my third year of coaching a boy’s team and a girl’s team. And yes I coached both of my kid’s teams.

5. I still want to do standup comedy somewhere but I am way too shy to get up in front of a crowd and actually do it. I would pass out quicker from being on stage than I would from having to get a shot (remember I am afraid of needles).

6. Sometimes I wish I had a really big family instead of the small one that I have. But then I remember what kind of a nightmare Thanksgiving is around my house without adding more people to the mix.

7. In college, my minor was theater. I had to take a costuming class and I actually can use a sewing machine without injuring myself. Hey don’t laugh; I needed something to help bring up my GPA.

Well that is pretty much it.

Thank you again Primed for giving me the award.


  1. Congratulations on your award and sharing those randoms and for this....."I think this award has already been spread around more the Snooki’s vagina"......even as an Irishman I got that one.

  2. Poor Snooki's Vagina... always the target of so many jokes.

    Grats on the award, man. I'm with you on #5.

  3. I also bite my nails. God, we're twinzeez!!

  4. Congrats mate, Snooki's Vag. ha ha
    If you had the chance you know you would take a dip.
    Cheers, Sausage...

  5. @ Lurker, thank you sir. I am glad you got that.

    @ Lost, well her vagina is a pretty easy target. Dammit there's another vagina joke.

    @ Lass, that might be a possibility.

    @ Sausage, I wouldn't touch her vagina for all the money in the world. She is just downright NASTY!!!!

  6. If you're too shy for stand-up maybe you should try doing some sketches online.

  7. Congratulations on the award!! :) :)
    And you own a cat??! How'd you manage that?? Cats aren't that easy to own.. ;)

  8. cure for biting fingernails - rub your hands in cowshit

    the end

  9. Good Morning Mr. Award Winner - a much deserved nod since you are the original "versatile" blogger!

    Bummer about the biting, cool about the cat and super about the sewing - I'm practicing my alphabet since I'm doing that darn A-Z challenge. Today, I'm going Godzilla!

    About the stand up - If I can ever get my VHS tape transferred to a DVD I would post my "grad night' from a comedy class I took years ago.

    It was the scariest thing ever, but I loved it! (nearly wet my big girl panties on grad night though)

    Personally - you would rock and you so need to find a way to give it a try - just do it! (complements of Nike)

    Cheers, Jenny

  10. @ TS, that would require me to get a web cam.

    @ Pencilgirl, my cat is pretty easy going.

    @ Rosie, I will pass on the cow shit.

    @ Pearson, thank you.

  11. Great post! Congrats on the award! Well deserved!!

  12. Re: #2, I'm not going to call you a pussy for owning a pussy because I'm sure he is a kick ass ninja cat.

    Re:#4, That's very admirable. Translation: better you than me.

    Re:#5, Before you go on stage, get everybody drunk, including yourself. That way they'll laugh at whatever you say and if they don't, you won't give a crap.

  13. Congrats on the award. I love cats, don't bash me for that. I think it's awesome that you coach AND can use a sewing machine! Very cool.

  14. Love these 7 things. You really should do some stand up if you have the desire. Just get some friends together to practice on it. Congrats on the award too!

  15. @ mamma, thank you very much.

    @ Mrs Hyde, trust me on the cat one. When you see the future post about him you will understand. And for #4 thank you. As for #5 that is actually what I was thinking that needed to happen before I could do it.

    @ Ally, thank you.

  16. Awesome to hear about other Canadian bloggers.

    Congrats on your comparable-to-Snooki's-vagina-award. No small feat.

    I like Rosie's idea for the nail biting. I do it, too, sometimes to the point of bloody fingers and thumbs. NASTY.



  17. Congrats on the award. All those things are what also make you an awesome dad!

  18. Congratulations on the award! I love this one becuase we get to learn new things about our favorite people that we might not get a chance to know.

  19. @ Stephanie, for some reason I popular with the women of Canada. Hmm. Thank you. And it was not a "Snooki" award per se, I was saying that the award had been passed around like Snooki.

    @ Laughingmom, thank you very much.

    @ Cinderita, thank you. I agree.

  20. Biting the nails...I'm pretty sure I have a cure for that.

    Do you have a naked pussy? You know...the hairless cats. Those are awesome!! If you do, can I pet it?

    You deserve the award...I thought maybe if I gave it to you it would be like stroking your, ummm, ego.

  21. Most of the time I feel like those awards are just people trying to fish for readers on someone's elses blog, but in your case, I think you're an awesome writer and should get an award.
    As for the nail biting, there is a product called No Bite. It's a clear polish you put on, and it tastes really bitter, thus working as negative reinforcement.
    Kudos on the sewing, its one of those things I wish I were better at!

  22. @ Primed, I bet you do. And no he is not a naked pussy. HE is a very hairy pussy.

    @ Amy, I never looked at it like that before. Hmm. But thank you for the compliment, I appreciate it. I will have to look into that cure.

  23. Congrats! And there's nothing wrong with being a cat owner.

  24. Ya know, I was wondering the same thing. What DOES Versatile Blogger mean? But, you nailed it. You CAN go from humorous writing (Penn State game) to serious stuff (Oil uses). Only talented (and versatile) writers can do that.

  25. @ Brandy, thank you very much.

    @ Al, thank you. I have been called talented. I am all non-Jeweish-varklempt right now.

  26. Oh thank God someone else hates needles as much as I! Also, I can't wait to hear about your hairy man pussy!!

  27. I know, I know... it just sounded more interesting when I referred to both instead of just "congrats on the award"


  28. Congrats on the award! They really need to jump on making new awards. I love getting them but can never pass them along because everyone has them already. The "nice rack" one was a welcome surprise and edition to the award rotation here on blogger! :-)

  29. @ Dawn, yep I hate needles with a passion. And the hairy pussy story will be coming up soon.

    @ Stephanie, ah ok good point.

    @ Jewels, thank you. And yes they sure do.

  30. I love you dearly and I feel bad for Snooki's vagina, but I've yet to receive this prestigious award. So its not all that common. Enjoy it dude!! Congratulations.

    Much love....

  31. Dude-- even I can't use a sewing machine. Props for you there. I doubt Snooki really has a vagina anymore. It's probably just merged with her asshole by now.

  32. @ Semi, thank you very much. I will have to pass it on in that case.

    @ Sara, well I guess I can do something a woman I know can't. And you are probably right about Snooki, although I am pretty sure her vagina smells just like her asshole.

  33. Congrats my friend... You really deserve it!

    I am all over number 6. I have a ridiculously small family and would love to have one Christmas where it was filled to the brim with people I adore and crazily full of happy chaos!

  34. Congratulations, OT!

    I can certainly relate to sometimes wanting a larger family. And then I look at the mental people already in the clan and wonder if I'm fucking outta my mind.

  35. congrats on the versatile *snooki's vagina* award...

    you are one fucking funny dude!

    being on stage is easy once you get that first laugh

  36. @ Averagegirl, thank you very much. I know what you mean.

    @ Katsidhe, that is why I am keeping it small around here.

    @ Bruce, thank you. And thank you again.

  37. Congrats! Hey is #3 why you love that bikini blogspot?

  38. @ Copyboy, no I liked women in bikinis way before I ever took that job. But I do like that blog though.

  39. Nobody will bash you for having a cat. Dogs are nothing but children who never grow up and leave home. You can leave your cat at home for the weekend alone, but NEVER your dog...

    Congrats on the award!

  40. @ Pat, thank you. And you are so right about the cat vs dog thing.

  41. I wish I knew how to work a sewing machine.

  42. @ Ditz, it is not that hard. Trust me if I can do it, anyone can.


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