A recipe of blurbs by a hungry dad-filled with sarcasm, truth, and a dash of that rare ingredient, common sense.

Monday, September 20, 2010

Sammich Energy

I have for years been trying to think about a way to come up with a solution to the world’s energy problems and future demands for energy. We do need a new source of energy as oil and gas will not last forever, and solar and wind only work as long as the sun is out and the wind is a blowing.

So after many years of thinking about the problem, I got some inspiration from a children’s movie that I love and recently watched again for the 100th time.

The movie “Monsters Inc” had the right idea but the wrong people. Initially they went after kids and scared them and captured their screams as a way to get cheap, clean, green energy. Then they realized that there was more power to be made from kid’s laughter, so they then started telling jokes to the kids to capture their laughs as way to generate power.

And this was a good idea, but I would like to take their idea a step further since there is a more powerful source of energy than the screams and laughs of children.

I want to bottle and store the anger of women. Think Monsters Inc but for with women instead of children. As we all know the anger of a woman is a powerful thing. If you don’t believe me ask any divorce attorney.

Can you imagine the amount of energy released by telling a woman she looks fat in them jeans? Or try telling a woman that her dinner tastes like shit. The amount of energy that could be produced by saying either of those two things to just ONE WOMAN could power a city the size of Houston for a month. Then take that one woman and multiply that by one billion. Everyone on the planet would have electricity cheaply and efficiently just by pissing your woman off once per month. I mean you are going to piss her off once a month anyways, at least this way you would be saving the planet at the same time.

I already know how to piss them off, now if I could just figure out how to collect, store, and harness the power of a woman scorned.

Yep you guessed it, I could be rich if I ever figure this shit out.


  1. At the rate you're going, just in your personal life, you could harness enough energy to power the US and sell extra energy to China AND get the country out of debt before brobama starts ramadan next year.

  2. Yes between you and sybil I am going to never have to pay a light bill ever again.

  3. You don't make me scream. I meant all the other people you piss off besides just sybil.

  4. There is not screaming silly girl, that was what the kids were doing when they were scared in the movie.

    But yes I have a natural talent for pissing people off.

  5. I only piss certain people off the wives of stupid men who gawk at me and both my ex-husbands...I'll work on bottling it and sending the anger to you...lol

  6. Well I have one person willing to help out our energy needs.


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