The Triple Nipple

People with an extra nipple are nothing new. Many people over the years have had an extra nipple on their chest or torso area.

Well this woman has a nipple in a new area. She has a third nipple and it is on the bottom of one of her feet.

Now I have heard of “pussy footing around” but I have never heard of “nipple footing around”.

Yes I said she has an actual nipple on the bottom of her foot.

I bet she never gets turned down when she asks for a foot massage. Hell I bet she even has guys (and even ladies) begging to give her a foot massage.

Can you imagine the shock and look on the little Asian ladies face at the nail salon when she goes and gets a pedi?

I wonder if it hurts her when she is walking around outside when it is cold.

Can you imagine having her on the bed with her legs over your shoulders, you could pinch two nipples and suck on the third at the same time.

Ok I will stop with the nasty jokes.

Oh No She Didn’t !!!!

Men you may not want to read this if you just ate your lunch. Or breakfast.

I don’t know if you heard about this or not, but this woman cut off her husband’s penis and stuffed it down the garbage disposal and turned it on.

Yes you read that correctly, she cut off his cock and put it down the garbage disposal and destroyed it.

Ouch.

Double ouch.

This whole story is beyond disturbing.

The guy was apparently divorcing this bitch/cunt/crazy demonic piece of shit woman and allowed her to continue to live at the house until she could find a place to live (mistake #1-you kick them out).

At some point she drugged his dinner (mistake #2-you never eat food cooked by crazy bitches) and the man went to lay down (mistake #3-never turn your back on a crazy bitch) because he felt ill. Shortly after going to bed the man passed out.

It was at that point that she tied him up, cut his dick off, and proceeded to the kitchen where she put it down the disposal.

The woman called 911 asking for medical help for the man. The police showed up and arrested her. She told police that he deserved it. She was charged with false imprisonment, assault with a deadly weapon, and aggravated mayhem. Now why does aggravated mayhem sound like that dude from the Allstate commercials.

The man was taken to a hospital where they were able to control the bleeding. A poor cop had to retrieve what was left of the penis from the sink (now there is a job I am very thankful I don’t have-can you imagine coming home from work and explaining how your day was?) and it is unclear if they will be able to re-attach it. If they can’t re-attach it they will be able to make a prosthetic penis.

Now I have a few comments about this. Ladies, it is not ok to do this. I don’t care if he fucked your mother and you walked in on it, nobody deserves this. You get a divorce and end it. Period. End. Of. Fucking. Story. The only time this is ever allowed is if the man is beating you and you slice it off to protect your life while he is beating you. That is the only time it is ever acceptable to do this.

There should be a law for this to where they can charge someone who does this kind of heinous crime with capital murder. Hey Trash did you just say capital murder? Hell yes I did. She killed his sex life. Forever. So yes this should be a crime punishable by death. Yes I am serious.

I feel sorry for this man. I really do. I have not seen an update to the original story to see of they were able to save his penis or if he had to have a prosthetic penis attached. But after seeing this picture of a garbage disposal below, would you really want it back?

Poor man, I will drink a beer, light a candle, and play Taps in your honor tonight.

We Lost, But It Was Still A Good Game

Well yesterday the USA women’s team played Japan in the final of the FIFA women’s world cup. And they lost.

The game was very exciting as both teams played an outstanding game. The US had many shots on goal in the first half but luck just wouldn’t put the ball into the net.

Each team ended up scoring great goals during the second half which forced the game into overtime at one goal apiece.

And each team scored a great goal in the overtime period which sent the game to penalty kicks.

The USA did horrible during the penalty kick shootout and Japan didn’t which is what gave the game to Japan.

I am not mad or sad about losing the World Cup final to Japan as both teams played a classy game without many fouls. The both played the beautiful game the way it was supposed to be played, and that is how it should be.

The USA women’s team should not be sad either. You had to win a playoff game to just qualify for the World Cup. Then you lost a game to Sweden in the group stage only to bounce back to play the epic game against Brazil. Then you beat a very talented France team to reach the final.

So USA, keep your chins up you will be ok. You have a very talented team and there is still more soccer to play. Next summer is the Olympics (which they have won the last two times) to look forward to. And I also heard that the next women’s World Cup is in Canada, hmm I may have to take myself and the kids up there to see it.

Oh and to the USA goalie Hope Solo, you can come play goalie with me anytime you hot thing you!!!

I Am An Inspiration. Apparently.

One of the blogs that I follow, My Joy Project posted an interesting post the other day.

Joy was listing the way that she wants to feel with a man. The list included adored, safe, desired, valued, wanted, appreciated, loved, and respected. The list is actually a pretty good list when you think about it.

I commented on her post that most if not all women want/demand to feel that way, but really if ever make men feel the same way. I also told her in an email that men want to feel that way as well, but we don’t say it out loud. Well all of those things except safe, unless you are dating/married to one of those body building weight lifting type women.

So ladies and men folk, what do you think. Is that list a list of reasonable things to want to feel from your partner?

So my comment to her in her original post caused her to write a post today about what she as a woman wants to give a man (I hope it includes a naughty email to me with nice pictures of her since I am pimping out her blog). 

So head over to My Joy Project to see what little Oilfield Trash inspired her to write.

I Love The USA!!!

Soccer is one of my eight favorite sports and I watch it regularly as I am lucky enough to have an MLS team here in Houston. But when the World Cup (men’s or women’s) is going on I am glued in and watch most if not all of the matches because there is a lot of good soccer being played. 

And yesterday a wonderful thing happened for our country. Over in Germany right now the FIFA Women’s World Cup is going on and our country’s team played against Brazil. Win the game and they advance to the semifinals and lose and they pack their bags to come back home.

Well the ladies from the USA won. Not just won but won in a dramatic come from behind fashion kind.

This game was in my mind one of the best World Cup games ever in both the men’s and women’s cups that I have ever seen. This game had everything in it from an own goal, a player sent off with a red card, a penalty kick, overtime, and finishing up with penalty kicks.

The game started off quickly with the US attacking and within two minutes they had a great shot on goal that a player from Brazil put the rebound in her own goal. The first half finished with the US leading 1-0.

Shortly after the second half started the ref called a foul on a US player in the box and awarded a penalty kick. The foul when shown on the replay was a complete bullshit call and the red card given to the US player should have never been pulled out of the ref’s pocket. But alas Brazil took the penalty kick but it was blocked. Then the ref claimed that the US goalie Hope Solo moved and gave Brazil another kick which they scored on. Complete bullshit if you saw the game. It was really funny to hear the English guy who was calling the game say multiple times that “the ref has lost the plot” since I knew what it meant. Yes I do know some Queens English terms and phrases.

(you can clearly see that this was no foul as the player from Brazil jumped in the air to go after the ball)

So with the scored tied 1-1 and playing with only 10 players, they kept Brazil out of the goal for the balance of the game.

On came the overtime period which Brazil quickly scored a goal to go up 2-1. The US never lost their composure through the balance of the game and kept playing. At the end of the overtime period one of the players from Brazil faked an injury trying to take time off of the clock but thankfully the ref added two minutes of stoppage time because the USA scored the game tying goal with just 30 seconds in the game (at this point I flew off of the couch and was screaming and yelling).

Thus the game moved onto penalty kicks to decide the winner. The USA made all five of their kicks while Brazil only made four of theirs (thanks to our goalie blocking one of theirs) so the USA won and advances to the final four and will play France on Wednesday morning.

Now if you saw this game then you know how much of a great game it was. And if you didn’t see the game, let me just say that this game summed up this team and America in general. These women played through adversity (in playing against both Brazil and the shitty ref as well as playing a man down due to the penalty) and never gave up and continued to play hard until the final whistle sounded.

Ladies of the US Soccer Team I am flying my flag high today. Thanks for all that you do and for not giving up when the odds are against you. You snatched victory from the arms of the grim reaper.

Oh and to our goalie Hope Solo, you are beautiful and you have a very nice set of athletic legs and thighs (she is the one in the gray outfit). You can email me anytime Hope, just take those big gloves off before you do as I don't think you can type very well with them on.

Don’t Mind Me, I Am Busy Reading

The UPS guy was nice enough to deliver and leave a package on my porch yesterday.

You see I bought this new book online yesterday from Amazon and I have been eagerly waiting for it to come so I can read it.

This book is the mother of all self help books.

Basically this book will help you with anything that is wrong with you whether or not you actually have a problem.

More to the point, this book is the best book ever written in recorded history.

No it is not a bible.

What is this great book you ask?

The book is called “Understanding Women. Volume 1”

The only problem with the book that I can see so far is that it was written by a woman. This explains why it is 12,745 pages long, written in very fine small print, and also not available on Kindle.

I will be back in six or so months to write a review for you.

A Blog For The Menfolk

Back in January I tried to post a rather hot video of Natalie Portman from the lesbian scene in the movie “Black Swan”. Well I posted the post and sometime shortly after the video was yanked from the internets.

I felt really bad about this and letting all of you men out there down.

So to make up for it, I give you this lovely little blog called Guess Her Muff. It is a nice blog that a friend of mine sent me where it shows you are picture of a woman dressed in normal clothes and you silently guess to yourself whether she is hairy, trimmed, landing strip, or completely bald down below.

All you have to do is click on the link for see answer “here” and a new tab will open up for you to see if your guess was correct.

It goes without saying that this blog is NOT SAFE FOR WORK or for people under the age of 18.

Ladies I am sure there is a blog like this out there for you with pictures of men on it, but I am not searching for it just for you.

Men, you can thank me later after you go through the hundreds of guesses.

Happy Mothers Day

I just wanted to take this time to say Happy Mothers Day to all of you mothers out there. And thank you for all that you do and have done during your lives. The world would not be the same without all of you mothers out there.

I used to always joke around that this day should be celebrated by doing the act that made them a mother in the first place. Well apparently Mother Nature gets that joke. I just snapped this little picture of these two on my front porch.

Happy Mothers Day!!!


EDITED TO ADD: I went back to check on these two and the deed was over. He was asleep on the brick wall and the girl was no where to be found. So when us men ask you ladies to leave after wards, it is just in our "nature" to do so, so don't be mad. lol

Nice Rack

One of blog buddies Bruce over at Stupid Stuff I See And Hear recently passed on a blog award to me. You see this award was not really meant for me, but it was more meant for me to pass on to the ladies.

And since I am not one to buck tradition, well I am going to post about it. The award says that you have to post a picture of your rack and pass the award onto five other bloggers.

Here we go. Here is an old picture of my rack back from the days that I was a stripper.

Now to pass on this great rack award to five ladies:

Absolutely Primed

Random Girl

Ramblings Of An Emotional Idiot

Hello Rosie

Brandi’s Place

Why the fuck didn’t I think of this damn award? I must be losing my creative touch.

And ladies please don't be shy when accepting this award, remember by posting the pictures you are helping the hearts of us men folk.

Hot Single Dads?

One of the tv shows that I watch a lot of is ‘Law And Order: Criminal Intent’. The cable channel Bravo one day a week shows a marathon of this show at night. I love this show so I tolerate the fact that it is on Bravo as I can’t stand the other shows on this network. I mean who in the hell watches “The Real Housewives of An Alabama Trailer Park” anyways? I mean I couldn’t watch a show about a bunch of whiney ass rich bitches women who have never seen the inside of a grocery store, laundry mat, or a kitchen for that matter. I would rather watch a show about a housewife who is a stay at home mom, raising kids, cooking, shopping at the grocery store, and keeping a house together (you know a real life) than some dumb ass women arguing in some restaurant that I can’t afford to eat in. But I digress.

While I was watching the latest marathon a couple of nights ago, a commercial caught my ears. It was a commercial where a bunch of women were sitting around and talking. Out of nowhere one of the women says, “Nothing is hotter than a single dad who spends time with his kids,” and all of the other women agreed with her. My mouth just dropped. I did not hear the rest of the commercial to even see what the commercial was about or the context of that statement as I was so stunned by this comment.

“Nothing is hotter than a single dad who spends time with his kids.” Let that set in for a minute with you. Got it? Good.

Women NEVER look at me. Yes I said it; women never even look at me or in my direction. No I am not being cynical either; I am saying the honest truth here. I am never looked at by women. It is not like I am unattractive, because I am decent looking. Yet I never get even so much as a glance or a smile from women.

I am the dad who coaches my kids youth sports teams. I am the dad who takes my kids everywhere and does everything with them. I am the dad who hangs up my kid’s artwork in my office at work (see the picture below). I am the dad who takes his kids to Destin, Florida for Spring Break. I am the dad who works his ass off at a job where I am not appreciated and yet still stays there to support his kids. I am the dad who sacrifices his personal life (friends, dating, etc) for his kids. I am the dad who takes everything my kids give me (toys, stuffed animals, Steelers stuff) and put it on my desk at work (also see the picture below). I am the dad who has a zoo in his house because his kids are animal lovers. I am the dad who sacrifices buying a nice huge two story house and a new car so that I can put my kids in private school to have a better education than what I had as a kid. I am the dad who does everything with my kids and everything for them. Hell even back when I was married and they were newborns, I was the dad who took them to all of their doctor’s appointments, not their mother.

If single dads who spend time with their children are so damn hot, I should be on the cover of every fucking magazine sold on the planet. I should be better known than the President of the United States is. TMZ should be following my ass around 24 hours a day instead of Charlie Sheen.

Yet women do not even look at me. No women.

Now I know that I am an awesome person because I am a good dad, I have a great sense of humor, I am a great story teller, I am smart, and I am one of the kindest people you will ever meet. I also know that all of my appeal is on the inside. I am like a time release capsule pill; I take a while to work on you. But would it be too much to ask that at least one or two women look at me occasionally? Or even say hello or something to me.

What that damn commercial should have said was, “Nothing is hotter than a single dad who spends time with his kids who also makes 200K plus a year, drives a BMW, lives in a 5000 square foot house, has rock hard abs, and has a 9 inch penis which is as big around as a tree trunk.”

Final Four Baby!!!!

In case you did not know it, the Final Four of men’s college basket ball is here in Houston this weekend. And I am going to it. No I don’t have tickets to the games on Saturday or the final on Monday, but I am still going.

You see I am taking my kids out of school early on Friday right after lunch. Reliant Stadium (the site of the games this year) has a deal where you can get in free and park for free (I get to keep an arm and a leg) to watch all four teams practice. And after the practices are over, there is a college all star game to be played. So since the Final Four has not been here in 40 years, I would say that this is a once in a lifetime deal for me and the kids. So we are going to go and soak it all up. And the NCAA will be giving away tickets on Friday to people at the practices to the actual games this weekend. So cross your fingers, meditate, send positive thoughts, pray for me, put a bucket of KFC and some rum in front of Jobu, or do whatever you have to do to get me some tickets to the games.

Now I wanted Texas to be in the Final Four but they did not make it. So I will just have to live with UConn vs. Kentucky and VCU vs. Butler. This year’s tournament has played havoc on my bracket since my bracket was fucked by the end of the first weekend. Normally I do fairly well in my bracket with my friends but not this year.

All in all I am not really excited about the match ups as I would be in most years. But since this year has been a tossup I guess I will just have to live with it. It will be interesting though because a small school (either VCU or Butler) is guaranteed to be in the final.

Although I must admit to you readers that I am really excited that Kentucky has made the Final Four. Why you ask? Well I will tell you why. You see Kentucky’s number one fan is going to be here in Houston this weekend. And she happens to be one of the hottest, girl-next door, I would lick every inch of her naked body, bake you a burnt apple pie and you would still eat it types of women on the planet. And that woman is Ashley Judd.

I sure hope Kentucky makes it to the final so that they show Ashley on tv a lot.

Ladies you might want to look away from this point forward unless you like hot brunettes. Men folk, you can thank me in the comment section. God she looks good in them jeans.

By the way, it is only fitting for this blog that my 100th post has pictures of a very hot woman in it.

BBQ RULES

Since the warm weather is arriving, that means we are about to enter the BBQ season. Therefore it is important to refresh your memory on the etiquette of this sublime outdoor cooking activity. When a man volunteers to do the BBQ the following chain of events are put into motion:

Routine...

(1) The woman buys the food.

(2) The woman makes the salad, prepares the vegetables, and makes dessert.

(3) The woman prepares the meat for cooking, places it on a tray along with the necessary cooking utensils and sauces, and takes it to the man who is lounging beside the grill - beer in hand.

(4) The woman remains outside the compulsory three meter exclusion zone where the exuberance of testosterone and other manly bonding activities can take place without the interference of the woman.

Here comes the important part:

(5) THE MAN PLACES THE MEAT ON THE GRILL.

More routine...

(6) The woman goes inside to organize the plates and cutlery.

(7) The woman comes out to tell the man that the meat is looking great. He thanks her and asks if she will bring another beer while he flips the meat.

Important again:

(8) THE MAN TAKES THE MEAT OFF THE GRILL AND HANDS IT TO THE WOMAN.

More routine...

(9) The woman prepares the plates, salad, bread, utensils, napkins, sauces, and brings them to the table.

(10) After eating, the woman clears the table and does the dishes.

And most important of all:

(11) Everyone PRAISES the MAN and THANKS HIM for his cooking efforts.

(12) The man asks the woman how she enjoyed ' her night off ' and, upon seeing her annoyed reaction, concludes that there's just no pleasing some women!

I hope all you have a great weekend!!! Sorry about having to post an old joke I got in an email from a friend, but I have family in from out of town and I did not have time to write a typical Oilfield Trash post.

Ladies, Show Us Your Boobs!!!

Since it is Mardi Gras right now, I think it is high time that you let us men folk have a glance at them. You have today and tomorrow to get them out and let them see the light of day (or night) before Ash Wednesday when all of you heathens have to straighten up for Lent.

Now I know what you thinking ladies, no I am not a pervert. I just happen to love boobs. All of them regardless of size or color. Small, medium, or large I love them all.

Men are genetically designed to love boobs. Hell even gay men can appreciate a nice rack. We men folk just love them and you will have to just get over it. So please don’t complain when we stare, gawk, drool, look at your breasts as we are meant to do so.

I know for many years that you ladies have all been saying that your eyes are “up here”, but there is a new reason why us men should be looking at your boobs.

A study just recently completed in Germany (you can read about it here) found that men that frequently look at boobs tend to have lower rates of heart disease than men who do not look at boobs at all.

Can you say the hell with jump rope for heart? Or maybe we could still do jump rope for heart but have only you ladies doing it so we can just watch. After all it would help your heart as well as ours at the same time.

It appears now that in addition to Cheerios, whole grain foods, and oatmeal that staring at your boobs does wonders for our hearts (don’t all rush out at once ladies to get a “heart healthy” tattoo on your breasts).

Ladies take one for the team and help our hearts stay healthy and let us men look at your boobs, sweater puppets, fun bags, girls, tits, boobies, titties, knockers, hooters, or insert your favorite boob adjective.

So women lower your shirts down just a little so we can get a view of them and remember you are doing it for our hearts sake.

I hope all of you appreciate the amount of time that I had to spend to find those pictures on the net. It tooks HOURS of looking at boobs to find the right pairs....

RIP Brett Favre

No, Brett Favre is not dead, but this season we saw the end of the fantastic NFL career of Brett Favre. Well I am assuming his career is done but as we all have seen over the years he has a habit of coming back when he has said he was done.

As Sunday wrapped up the second weekend of the NFL playoffs it seems strange not having Favre in the playoffs as the teams he has played on normally made the playoffs. You see normally his name is one of the ones thrown around during pregame shows and halftime shows, and is always a part of highlights on Sportscenter during the playoffs. So it is really weird to not hear his name being called after 20 years of hearing it in the playoffs.

Favre played in the NFL for 20 seasons, which is a lot of years for the position of quarterback if you think about it considering all the abuse a quarterback takes during games. Now I am not fan of Favre as I am a Steelers fan, but I can appreciate the great players who have played the game. He played through many injuries throughout his career and accomplished a lot of things. And if I remember correctly he played a game for the Packers on the day his dad passed away (and had the game of a lifetime too that night). That guy is the modern day man of steel to have done some of the things he has done. I just wish he would have played all of his years with Green Bay as I like to see great players stay with one team.

Let’s take a look at some of his career stats shall we?

300 plus games played
71,000 plus passing yards (the only NFL QB to do this)
500 plus touchdown passes (the only NFL QB to do this)
10,000 plus pass attempts (the only NFL QB to do this)
6,000 plus completions
525 sacks
336 interceptions
1 Superbowl Victory
1 cover of Madden game

But here is the statistics he will be most remember for.

197 text messages to two massage “therapists”
245 text messages to a New York Jets employee (who is fucking smoking hot)
50 picture text messages of his “penis” to said New York Jets employee
2 inch penis

Wait did you say 2 inch penis? Yes I did. You see some of the text messages he sent to ladies included a picture of his “roll of dimes” penis and the media released some of the pictures. I did not personally see the pictures, but the sports radio station I listen to mentioned that he was not packing in that department. I guess we need to rename the “Packers” because the man that led them for 15 years was not in any sense of the word a “Packer”.

And when I was doing the research for this post, I found out why I found the woman from the Jets he sent the nasty text messages to was so familiar. You see when I googled her (her name is Jenn Sterger if you want to google her for yourself), her pictures from college came up. She was the hot ass coed that ABC and ESPN used to focus in on every time they broadcasted a Florida State football game. Bret I can’t blame you for sending a picture of your roll of dimes to her because she is hot.

I digress, I guess I just wanted to say that you can take the man out of Southern Mississippi but you can’t take the Southern Mississippi out of the man. The guy in my opinion is not very smart or lacks in the common sense department. If I had a 2 inch penis, I sure as fuck would not be sending a picture of it to women I want to screw because if they know in advance what you have, chances are you are not getting any from them.

I just wished he would have stayed with the Packers for his whole career because I will always think of him as a Green Bay player. And if he had stayed at Green Bay it is doubtful that the text message scandal would have happened which is going to haunt him forever. But just like he couldn’t stay with one woman (ie his wife) he couldn’t stay with one team (ie the Packers) for life.

The irony is not lost on me though that even Mother Nature has had enough of his shenanigans. On the weekend where he missed his first start in 20 years, she made it snow so much that the stadium roof collapsed a couple of nights before the next home game. I think that is an omen that he needs to heed and hang it up because that sound you hear is the fat lady singing.

Hot, Hot, Hot -NSFW

Since I wrote about something sad/angry yesterday, I give you something more happy today.

Now I normally don’t write about such smut lovely topics such as my unhealthy obsession crushes with celebrity women I would like to bang, but I am going to make an exception for you just this one time. You see my favorite Jewish hottie (sorry Robyn you are my second favorite Jewish hottie) on the planet is Natalie Portman. I have had a little fantasy crush on her for some time. And recently I was sent the link for this nice little video. The video clip is a trailer from the new movie “Black Swan” and it is NOT SAFE FOR WORK. You see I have dreamed of licking her between her legs like a cow licks a salt block in summer time her for ages and well just take a look at this video for yourself and see who I wished I was. If you are offended by images of simulated sex, please go to www.disney.com now.

Needless to say I will indeed be purchasing this movie when it comes out on DVD regardless of how good the rest of the movie is outside of these 2 minutes.

EDITED: It was supposed to be a video of Natalie Portman from the new movie "Black Swan" and it was a lesbian make out scene where Natalie was half nekkid having a chick going down on here. But alas the clip has been removed. So just use your imagination.

Horny Women

I am not sure if this has been happening all my life (and not reported to parents or not reported to the police) or if this is just a recent thing to start happening. But it seems to me that at least once a week there is a news report in our country of some hot white woman either having sex with a teenage boy something along those lines.

Most of the women have been teachers having sex with students, and these women have been hot. I mean really attractive, like out of my league attractive. Now they may be bat shit crazy (since they are having sex with underage guys) but hey ladies, have you ever heard of hitting up a bar? Every bar (well every straight bar) is full of horny men who would fuck you at the drop of a dime. With you being bat shit crazy I realize that you may not be able to find a man to put up with you long term, but you can close your eyes and without any trouble find a horny man to fuck you senseless. Hell you damn horny middle aged women teachers can call me and I will help you out.

Back when I was in school (junior high, high school, and even college) there was not a decent looking woman teacher who could have gotten me hard enough for a blow job, much less hard enough for me to bang. Not even when drunk would I have touched any of them as they were all old cat ladies with hairy moles all over their bodies (yes I had x-ray vision back then).

Then here recently in Houston a hot blonde middle aged mother and wife was arrested for sending her sons best friend nude pictures of herself (you can read about it here). The best friend of her son was 16 years old. I looked her up on Facebook when this story broke, and she had some hot ass photos of herself on there. I wonder who called the cops (whether the mom found out or the boy told his mom) on this woman. If the boy told his mom about this, the boy is gay. Trust me on this one.

The adult/parent in me says that this woman was in the wrong and shouldn’t have done it. But the dirty, pervy, horny bastard (well 16 year old horny bastard) in my wishes I would have had a sexy ass middle aged woman sending me naked pictures of herself to me. I mean at 16 I would have been trying to nail the fuck out of this woman and not having the cops trying to nail her.

If you look at this website you will see what I am talking about. The website has a nice little list of a ton of women convicted for banging underage guys. I know half of them are fugly, but the other half are attractive enough that they should be able to get a guy to fuck them if they picked up a guy in a nightclub. And well let’s be honest here, pretty much most of them were attractive enough for me to bang when I was 16 as I was a horny bastard.

Now I know all of this shit that these women are doing is illegal, but why is this happening now? Are women today just crazier or are they just more risky in their pursuit of cock? One thing is for sure, where the fuck was these horny women at when I was going through school?

Sammich Energy

I have for years been trying to think about a way to come up with a solution to the world’s energy problems and future demands for energy. We do need a new source of energy as oil and gas will not last forever, and solar and wind only work as long as the sun is out and the wind is a blowing.

So after many years of thinking about the problem, I got some inspiration from a children’s movie that I love and recently watched again for the 100th time.

The movie “Monsters Inc” had the right idea but the wrong people. Initially they went after kids and scared them and captured their screams as a way to get cheap, clean, green energy. Then they realized that there was more power to be made from kid’s laughter, so they then started telling jokes to the kids to capture their laughs as way to generate power.

And this was a good idea, but I would like to take their idea a step further since there is a more powerful source of energy than the screams and laughs of children.

I want to bottle and store the anger of women. Think Monsters Inc but for with women instead of children. As we all know the anger of a woman is a powerful thing. If you don’t believe me ask any divorce attorney.

Can you imagine the amount of energy released by telling a woman she looks fat in them jeans? Or try telling a woman that her dinner tastes like shit. The amount of energy that could be produced by saying either of those two things to just ONE WOMAN could power a city the size of Houston for a month. Then take that one woman and multiply that by one billion. Everyone on the planet would have electricity cheaply and efficiently just by pissing your woman off once per month. I mean you are going to piss her off once a month anyways, at least this way you would be saving the planet at the same time.

I already know how to piss them off, now if I could just figure out how to collect, store, and harness the power of a woman scorned.

Yep you guessed it, I could be rich if I ever figure this shit out.