Yes There Is Change Coming

And no I am not speaking about the kind of change that people voted for in 2008. I am talking about some personal changes that are going on in my life.

I have normally been a happy person throughout most of my life. When I got married I kind of lost/forgot the person I was prior to getting married. After leaving my ex-wife I was on track to getting back to myself. Then a relationship gave me another setback. After that one ended, I got back to myself again. I had not been as happy with myself at that moment since I was a teenager.

Then I made some really tough decisions/actions/etc two years ago that changed my life for the worse. And it was during the last two years that I started to lose the person that was Oilfield Trash. Well except for here where I write, this was the only place I was still sort of myself. If you noticed, I never lost my sense of humor.

And as you know the last six months at work consumed my life. It became a living hell for me. I became a huge asshole because I was always working, always tired, always stressed, sick daily, mentally exhausted, I couldn’t give any time to anyone who asked. Basically I shut out everyone from my life and I knew it. All I wanted to do was SLEEP.

I basically lost the core person I was and had become someone else that I did not know.

Now I knew back in May and June that I was rock bottom in a hell hole. And I knew that as soon as my work situation got better in October/November that I had to make a lot of changes.

So in October I started working on these changes. In no particular order I am going to do, doing, or have done the follow:

1. I quit drinking Mountain Dew. Yes I said it. I was addicted to Mountain Dew more than sex and I gave it up cold turkey. Yes I had a lot of headaches for a while but it was worth it. Not only am I saving money by not drinking it, but I am also not getting tons of sugar that just made me fat.

2. I started drinking tons of water in lieu of not drinking Mountain Dew. I have been drinking so much water I have changed my name to H2O. And I can’t remember the last time my urine was any other color than clear.

3. I started walking one to two miles a day. Now this one combined with the no more Mountain Dew since mid October has caused me to lose 25 pounds.

4. As you know I quit smoking two weeks ago. And when you combine the first three things with the no smoking, you can see why I feel fucking GREAT each and every day. I literally feel like a million bucks.

5. I am getting more in touch with my feelings for things. I told you earlier this week about how I learned the tough lesson of saying I love you to someone. This one has made me feel a lot better.

6. I am spending more time with my kids and doing stuff just for them and only them.

7. I am taking time each week and each day to do something just for me. This is a huge one for me since in the last couple of years I have forgot that I need to do that.

8. I am also not letting anyone or anything bother me anymore. People at work, situations, etc are no longer bothering me and not worth the time/effort/stress to ever let stuff bother me.

9. I am also being a nicer person to everyone since I have always been a truly nice person to everyone.

10. I am getting back to being more spiritual.

11. I am trying and learning to control my temper. And this is a huge one for me.

Now a lot of this stuff is really hard to do, and I am struggling with them all the time.

As a result of doing all of this stuff, I have got “ME” back. I feel like I did when I was 21. I feel like I can conquer the world. It truly is a great thing to have “ME” back.

Depression Is Normal, Right?

I wish they made a pill for depression.

What is that you say? Oh they already make pills for depression; well shit I guess I am late to the self help game.

No I wish they made a pill for depression that did not have side effects. All of the pills out on the market today have strong side effects which are worse than the actual depression. You know the side effects I am talking about where the pills give you chest pain (as if you didn’t already have it from anxiety), loss of appetite (as if you could eat anyways), loss of sex drive (if you were getting laid you wouldn’t be depressed right?), insomnia (like you didn’t already have trouble sleeping), gas with an oily discharge (nothing cheers you up like half ass shitting yourself), and suicidal thoughts (isn’t this what you were trying to avoid in the first place).

All jokes aside, I am depressed. I have been depressed for a while for a multitude of reasons that I won’t bore you with. Suffice to say I think I need a vacation. A vacation away from all adult responsibility.

I think I need to look into making a new pill for depression. A pill with no side effects and can tap into already existing problems that I have. You know a pill that could encourage my inner procrastinator side and make me put off my depression for another day. I think I could make a lot of money off of that idea.

Till then I wish they just had this pill below. Yes I know this picture is really old, but it is still funny to me.

I Am Appreciated A Little

A while back I wrote a post about how I did not feel appreciated at all. I was really depressed and was just down about some things which were going on in my life.

Well a week or so later my daughter asked me when I got home from work what I had to eat for lunch. I told her that well I was not eating lunch and had not ate lunch at work in months because I was trying to save money and also trying to lose some weight.

My daughter told me that it was not acceptable for me to not eat lunch every day. She then asked me if I wanted her to make me lunch every morning while she is making her lunch. I told her no, that it was not necessary for her to do that. She is not one who takes the word no lightly.

On my way home from work she called me and told me that I need to stop at the store and buy the stuff that I would like to have in my lunches. And she told me that if I came home without going to the store for lunch stuff, that there would be “hell” to pay.

So I stopped at the grocery store on the way home from work and dropped about 50 bucks on lunch meat, bread, sliced Swiss cheese, apples, pears, oranges, fruit cups, and yogurt. When I walked through the door my daughter ran to me and gave me a big hug for listening to her.

The next morning I woke up and found that she had already made my lunch and put it inside one of her old lunch boxes. I took it to work and ate all the contents of what she had packed for me. But the most important thing that she packed for me was a little left over Valentines cards (the type that kids pass out at school) that told me how much she loved me. I almost cried right there at the lunch table in the break room at work.

On my way home from work that day I stopped at the store and bought my daughter a half gallon of her favorite Blue Bell ice cream for just being so sweet.

Since that day my daughter asks me in the morning each day if I would like her to make me a lunch. I of course tell her that she does not half to do so, but every day she still makes my lunch.

I am glad to know that I have at least instilled a little bit of my loving nice nature in her. And I am also glad to know that I am indeed appreciated a bit at home. Now if I could just get her and her brother to stop fighting so much I think home will be perfect.

Ladies, Show Us Your Boobs!!!

Since it is Mardi Gras right now, I think it is high time that you let us men folk have a glance at them. You have today and tomorrow to get them out and let them see the light of day (or night) before Ash Wednesday when all of you heathens have to straighten up for Lent.

Now I know what you thinking ladies, no I am not a pervert. I just happen to love boobs. All of them regardless of size or color. Small, medium, or large I love them all.

Men are genetically designed to love boobs. Hell even gay men can appreciate a nice rack. We men folk just love them and you will have to just get over it. So please don’t complain when we stare, gawk, drool, look at your breasts as we are meant to do so.

I know for many years that you ladies have all been saying that your eyes are “up here”, but there is a new reason why us men should be looking at your boobs.

A study just recently completed in Germany (you can read about it here) found that men that frequently look at boobs tend to have lower rates of heart disease than men who do not look at boobs at all.

Can you say the hell with jump rope for heart? Or maybe we could still do jump rope for heart but have only you ladies doing it so we can just watch. After all it would help your heart as well as ours at the same time.

It appears now that in addition to Cheerios, whole grain foods, and oatmeal that staring at your boobs does wonders for our hearts (don’t all rush out at once ladies to get a “heart healthy” tattoo on your breasts).

Ladies take one for the team and help our hearts stay healthy and let us men look at your boobs, sweater puppets, fun bags, girls, tits, boobies, titties, knockers, hooters, or insert your favorite boob adjective.

So women lower your shirts down just a little so we can get a view of them and remember you are doing it for our hearts sake.

I hope all of you appreciate the amount of time that I had to spend to find those pictures on the net. It tooks HOURS of looking at boobs to find the right pairs....